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Me + Markets = Stress


There are various ways to make purchases in Nigeria. If you are a true Nigerian, you go to the market, if you are an ajebutter (boogie Nigerian) you go to Shoprite (grocery store). When it comes to buying groceries, call me an ajebutter all you want, I don’t care and I don’t mind. I strongly DISLIKE going to the market. I feel it is one of the most stressful ordeals you’ll ever encounter in your entire life!! Yes your entire life!!! Don't let anybody tell you how "cute" the African markets are, don't let them lie to you and tell you it is the best thing ever. It isn't and if anybody should tell you that, remove them from your life, they don't want whats best for you. You don't need that type of person in your life. 
Propaganda: it ain't this calm 

The market is a good place to get everything you want. It is really a one stop shop. You can buy groceries, things for your house, clothes, fabrics, get your hair, nails, and eyebrows done, fix broken things, whatever you want to do, you can do in the market. But with all these options, come stress! Unnecessary, exhaustive, unbearable stress. I get super stressed. Stress comes from walking from one end to the other; getting bumped by sweaty people; walking in sometimes muddy paths (from the rain); and the most stressful of them all, PRICING! I know I sound really boogie right now but y’all love me so deal with it J. Lol

Of all the things I don’t like about the market, the fact that you have to haggle prices has got to be the thing I hate the most. It is really the worst thing ever (maybe not the worst because there’s poverty and violation of human rights, but you get the point; I don’t like it). When you approach a stand and ask the price of an item, chances are the seller would have inflated the price by 30% to 100%. Once you’ve been told the “price” it is your duty to start haggling the price. You have to argue this person down. You have to act disinterested in the item (as you stand there telling them to reduce the price, doesn’t really make sense). You have to threatened to walk away and buy from somebody else. You have to tell them that you bought this same item last week for a much lower price than what you are willing to pay. You have to tell them that you are just trying to patronize them. You have to ask if they don’t want you to be a regular customer. See, I’m not a gamer so I don’t like to play games. I don’t have time to stand here and play 20 questions, either you tell me the right price or you leave it.


I have family members that will haggle you down, it’s not like they can’t afford to pay the price that was given, but I think it has now become a sport. Like, how low can you go and even when the merchant goes low, they are still beating him down to go lower. Watching this exchange is physically exhausting. I’ve tried on several occasions but I cannot. I feel like I am the merchants’ favorite type of customer, he calls a price, I call a price and we meet somewhere in the middle. My haggle method is quick and to the point. I will not spend more than 2 minutes discussing price. Either you sell for what I call or you don’t. They don’t have to sell lower than they want and I don’t have to buy either. But it is funny when you walk away and they come running with their tail between their legs asking you to buy for the price you called. Lol!! #Savage

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